A gift for me

Crack open the bubbly! I’ve finally done it! I’m doing it!

Today, *deep breaths* I am leaping into the blogosphere – a place I’ve wanted to enter for so long, but have been too much of a scaredy cat to until now.

My heart is racing and my mind is scattered with what ifs swirling around in it. Who knew clicking the publish button could be so terrifying? Aarrgghh, here goes!

Get comfy, grab yourself a cuppa, and learn about me and what has driven me to take this leap.

Renee

“Mummmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyy!”

My eyes blinked open in panic as I heard my daughter howl into the night. As the howls became more urgent, I pulled my head up from my dribble soaked pillow, scratched around in the dark for my glasses, banged my leg on the corner of the bed adding yet another bruise to my collection, and hobbled like an old lady in the direction of howling. ‘Don’t wake the baby, don’t wake the baby,’ I repeated over in my head. When I reached my daughter I was greeted with a very upset little girl with bed sheets soaked through. It was 4.12am and so started my day.

This day was filled with special moments with my two precious daughters. We giggled, blew bubbles and pretended to be dinosaurs. We painted, sang, jumped, danced and watched Dora. In between all of this, I attempted to do the washing, ironing and cook dinner.

This day was one of the good ones when I managed to get both girls to nap at the same time. Happy days. I raced to the DVD player and sat in front of the TV like a zombie watching Melrose Place. Not the new series mind you, the original, from like, 1992. Yep, it was cool then when I was a teenager, but now … not so much.

I felt that surely there was something better I could be doing in my ‘free time’. I was exhausted though, sluggish even, as if I was walking around in some sort of fog. Even though I am completely and totally in love with my two darling daughters and my devoted husband, I felt a little sad. I didn’t feel like me. This led me to wonder … How did I lose me? Where did I go? When I was playing with my daughters I felt like the Energizer bunny dancing and singing up a storm, but when they were asleep I didn’t know what to do with myself. I’d lost my zing. I felt uninspired, tired, cranky, lonely and basically blah! My husband would come home from work and I’d often be lifeless. Someone had zapped the fun out of me.

This day, while watching Melrose, I realised I wanted, I needed something for me. Something that was special. Something that could give me an escape and make me feel excited and alive again!

This day, I thought back to an article on mummy bloggers that a colleague at work had shown me almost a year ago now. When I had read it, I had an epiphany. This is what I must do, I told myself. I called my husband and my Dad with excitement and told them I was going to start a blog while on maternity leave (with my second child) and become a famous writer! My excitement waned over the months however as I struggled with my new role as mum of two under two-and-a-half.

This day though, with my second daughter five months old and me feeling like I had a slight handle on things, I decided that it was time. It was time for me to dive headfirst into the blogosphere and share my life with the world. I have always loved writing and I’m an open book. I love talking about myself and getting a laugh out of people, so blogging seems like a natural progression for me. Plus, it would allow me to continue to develop my writing and communication skills while on leave. It seemed like the something special I was looking for.

This day, after much thought, I told my husband that I needed a Notebook to commence my blogging career. I felt guilty spending the money, but my husband, bless him, understood how important this was for me and bought me one.

So here I am, sat at my sparkling new Notebook, cup of tea by my side, one daughter at daycare, the other in bed, me ready to share my life with the world.

What will I blog about? I’m still figuring that out and maybe you can help me figure it out too. Share my journey with me as a mum of two and help me remember to not lose sight of me.

This Notebook, this gift for me, is more important to me than words can describe. I have butterflies in my tummy. I feel excitement in the air. It’s my time to share.

It’s not all about me though! This blog is also my gift to you, my readers. To those of you who also feel they have lost their identity, I hope that this insight into my life will assure you that you are not alone. We can muddle through this journey of rediscovery together with lots of laughter, tears … and chocolate.

52 comments on A gift for me

  1. Claire
    May 1, 2013 at 7:32 am (4 years ago)

    Fantastic & Congratulations! I can’t wait to follow your story, & hopefully find my own identity amongst my own family & working life too! Great work Renee!!

    Reply
  2. Courtney
    May 1, 2013 at 10:41 am (4 years ago)

    Loved it!
    Very well written.

    Reply
  3. mummywifeme
    mummywifeme
    May 1, 2013 at 10:50 am (4 years ago)

    Thank you all! I’m so glad you like it!

    Reply
  4. Gillian
    May 1, 2013 at 11:31 pm (4 years ago)

    Well done Renee!Great start-keep it up!

    Reply
  5. stephieg
    May 2, 2013 at 2:26 am (4 years ago)

    Just breaking for lunch, so thought I’d read your masterpiece! It’s great Renee, you are going to have a lot of fun with this, I can tell. Had a few wet eye moments there myself ;). Keep up the good work xxx

    Reply
  6. Rose
    May 2, 2013 at 2:32 am (4 years ago)

    Great to read about a super Brissy Mummy. I understand about the ‘identity’ thing – looking forward to reading your thoughts and experiences about this stage of life. xox

    Reply
  7. ReneeReese
    May 2, 2013 at 4:08 am (4 years ago)

    Congratulations Renee! Loved it, related to it and can’t wait for more!

    Reply
  8. Maree OShea
    May 2, 2013 at 5:57 am (4 years ago)

    I’m so trilled for you. I so much enjoy your facebook comments so this will be wonderful. xo

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      June 6, 2013 at 9:25 pm (4 years ago)

      You’re welcome! Thank YOU, Monique πŸ™‚

      Reply
  9. Lydia C. Lee
    June 8, 2013 at 12:50 pm (4 years ago)

    Congrats & good luck! My theory is, if nothing else it keeps me busy so I don’t spend money…but I do need to exercise πŸ™

    Reply
  10. mummywifeme
    mummywifeme
    June 8, 2013 at 9:26 pm (4 years ago)

    Lol. Thank you, Lydia πŸ™‚ If nothing else, I’m too busy on this to eat chocolate πŸ™‚ Win win πŸ™‚

    Reply
  11. Melanie
    June 14, 2013 at 9:21 pm (4 years ago)

    I found your blog through FYBF and I must say I really enjoy your style of writing! I can relate to a lot of what you’re talking about. I too worked in the communications and having since had children feel a little lost. I think having a blog really helps sort out your emotions and put together something you can be proud of. I look forward to reading more!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      June 15, 2013 at 9:58 am (4 years ago)

      Thank you so much, Melanie. It is amazing how much this blog has helped me along my journey. Free therapy. Woohoo. I’m looking forward to reading more of yours too! Thanks for dropping by πŸ™‚

      Reply
  12. Robomum
    June 30, 2013 at 11:42 pm (4 years ago)

    Congratulations! I’ll be coming back to your blog to read more.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      July 1, 2013 at 6:39 am (4 years ago)

      Thank you so much, Robomum! I’m super excited to have you here.

      Reply
  13. Jen
    August 22, 2013 at 7:19 am (4 years ago)

    I also have two girls and I too wake with dribble soaked pillow, have to search for my glasses, have a collection of bruises and feel very much that I could have written your post! Welcome to the blogosphere – I’m pretty much a newbie too, but it’s great to finally get our act together hey!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 7:46 am (4 years ago)

      It sure is, Jen. Just read your blog and I can definitely see the similarities πŸ™‚

      Reply
  14. Lisa - lybliss
    August 22, 2013 at 7:57 am (4 years ago)

    Ahh the mind-numbing soothing drivel of Melrose Place !
    I’m so pleased you recognised the writer inside yourself and found a way to let her out.
    (and what an awesome hubby to buy the notebook to start the adventure)
    Great first post xx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:12 pm (4 years ago)

      Thank you, Lisa. Yes, there’s no way I could let myself watch Melrose any longer πŸ˜‰

      Reply
  15. Lydia C. Lee
    August 22, 2013 at 8:10 am (4 years ago)

    Does it still make you fell alive and excited? That’s lovely!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:12 pm (4 years ago)

      It sure does, Lydia!

      Reply
  16. Katyberry
    August 22, 2013 at 8:39 am (4 years ago)

    I am really enjoying visiting these first posts. I would never have guessed that you were a newbie.
    One of the things that I enjoy about blogging is the different styles of writing people apply to similar subject matter. It is such a personal thing.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:13 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Katrina πŸ™‚ I know, I love all of the different styles too. Before I started blogging, I’d only read a handful of blogs. Now I can’t stop!! There’s so much great stuff out there.

      Reply
  17. Lisa @ Raising Explorers
    August 22, 2013 at 8:59 am (4 years ago)

    Oh the excitement! Loving reading what inspired so many bloggers to take the plunge. I enjoy your creative writing – great imagery. Oh, I’m such an English teacher…

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:14 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Lisa. Your compliments mean alot πŸ™‚

      Reply
  18. Francesca
    August 22, 2013 at 9:14 am (4 years ago)

    Well done on taking the leap! I was at about the same stage with my kids when I started my blog too. I hope you keep doing it for a long time to come!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:14 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Francesca. I hope I become a seasoned blogger like you!

      Reply
  19. Robomum
    August 22, 2013 at 9:34 am (4 years ago)

    I’ve been here before! Thanks for linking your post with The Lounge!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:15 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks for having me, Robomum. Such a great opportunity to get to know our bloggy community a little more.

      Reply
  20. Emily
    August 22, 2013 at 11:26 am (4 years ago)

    The more of other people’s first posts I read, the more embarrassed I am about mine! But we all have to start somewhere. Love your start. x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:15 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Emily! I love yours too. It’s succint and leaves you wanting more. Mine’s a bloody essay πŸ˜‰ x

      Reply
  21. Ness
    August 22, 2013 at 11:44 am (4 years ago)

    Really enjoyed reading this and getting to know a bit about you. Loving your thoughts about sharing the ride of motherhood, especially the chocolate bit! xo

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:16 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Ness. I just read yours and was in stitches πŸ™‚

      Reply
  22. Tegan
    August 22, 2013 at 12:26 pm (4 years ago)

    Love that you are doing this because you want to have something for yourself. So many times as a mum we put ourselves last and it’s awesome to have something that is just ours.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 2:16 pm (4 years ago)

      True Tegan. I feel lucky that I’ve been able to find my passion πŸ™‚

      Reply
  23. Alex
    August 22, 2013 at 5:48 pm (4 years ago)

    superbly written,

    Though you had me right at the start with ‘dribble-soaked pillow’

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 8:12 pm (4 years ago)

      Lol. Thanks so much, Alex.

      Reply
  24. Lara @ This Charming Mum
    August 22, 2013 at 6:08 pm (4 years ago)

    What a wonderful first post! I can almost feel the butterflies and that sense of possibility. I hope it has turned out to be everything you hoped it would be πŸ™‚

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 8:12 pm (4 years ago)

      It sure has, Lara πŸ™‚

      Reply
  25. Emily @ Have a laugh on me
    August 22, 2013 at 7:27 pm (4 years ago)

    Wow what an impressive first blog, it’s bloody awesome – and I love how you write, it’s very descriptive and creative – keep up the great work mummy!
    xx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 8:13 pm (4 years ago)

      Aww thank you! That means alot coming from you x

      Reply
  26. Kirsty @ My Home Truths
    August 22, 2013 at 10:23 pm (4 years ago)

    What an awesome gift to yourself Renee – both the notebook and the blog! I completely understand the need to find something for yourself and to reclaim your own identity – definitely part of the reason I started blogging too. Hope you continue for many more years to come!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 10:44 pm (4 years ago)

      Thank you so much, Kirsty. I hope to become a seasoned blogger just like you πŸ™‚

      Reply
  27. Rach
    August 22, 2013 at 10:35 pm (4 years ago)

    Renee can I just say I am so glad you took that leap into the blogosphere xx Glad you gave yourself and all of us the gift of your writing xx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      August 22, 2013 at 10:44 pm (4 years ago)

      Awww you’re so sweet. You’ve made my day. Thank you xx I’m chuffed to bits πŸ™‚

      Reply
  28. Kathy
    May 3, 2014 at 8:15 am (3 years ago)

    Well done on your anniversary Renee – hoping it has proved the gift you were seeking and so glad to hang around with you in the blogosphere.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 4, 2014 at 7:14 am (3 years ago)

      Thank you, Kathy! Likewise x

      Reply
  29. The Exercise Hitlist
    September 5, 2014 at 12:01 am (3 years ago)

    Can definitely relate to this, your very first blog. Love your writing!!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 5, 2014 at 9:11 pm (3 years ago)

      Oh thank you so much. You are too kind πŸ™‚

      Reply

2Pingbacks & Trackbacks on A gift for me

  1. […] has given me everything that I hoped it would and more over the past six months. It is the something special I craved to snap me out of my mummy fog and make me feel alive again. It is something for me, my passion, my therapy, my release. It […]

  2. […] started blogging because I needed something for me. This blog was my gift to me. A form of therapy. I wanted to create something that would strike a chord with readers and provide […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Comment *