Me to Curly-locks: ‘Do you want salmon for dinner tonight, darling?’
Curly-locks whining: ‘I don’t like sal-monnnnnnnnnnn’.
Me: ‘Oh gosh, sorry, silly mummy, sheesh, it’s not salmon. It’s pink fish. Pink fish is what this is. Daddy ate all of that naughty salmon. Here, have some pink fish’.
Liar, liar pants on fire. Yep, that’s me. This is what motherhood has done to me. I just can’t help myself. The lies effortlessly trickle out of my mouth without a second thought.
Does that make me a compulsive liar, or just a mum with a volatile toddler on her hands doing what she can to get by?
I’m sure EVERYONE does it. My parents did it to me. It was only a couple of years ago that I found out one of their corkers. They had always told me my pet bird Tweety had flown away. He hadn’t. He drowned when his cage was left outside during a storm. DEVASTATED. They did what they thought was best at the time though to save me from some very serious upset.
I’m just doing the same thing, right?!
Anyway, without further ado, for a bit of Friday fun, here are the few lies I’ve found myself spinning this week.
- I know right? It’s crazy. Such a big packet, but only five Tiny Teddies in it.
- Your Aunty just sent me a message and said your little cousin’s asleep, so you better get to sleep too.
- Curly-locks: ‘What are you eating, Mummy?’
Me shoving the remaining Tiny Teddies into my mouth while hiding behind the kitchen bench (yes, I know I’m on a sugar detox): ‘Apple. Want some?’
- Curly-locks screaming: ‘Mummy, the seatbelt’s too tight’.
Me pretending to loosen it: ‘There, that’s better’.
- Ahh what a shame. The TV’s not working. We’ll have to get Daddy to fix it. No Dora today 🙁
Do you tell little white lies to keep the peace at your house? What are your favourites?