No more naps

I flinch as I hear her bedroom door slam and sigh as I hear her little feet run across the lounge room floor above me.

I can’t help but smile as I walk to the bottom of the stairs and see Curly-locks, my three-year-old, standing at the top looking down at me. Her hair a tangled mass of curls, her big brown eyes giving me the ‘We cool, Mummy?’ look, her cheeky grin making me laugh as I shake my head in surrender.

Who wants to sleep when you can dance in the garden instead?

Who wants to sleep when you can dance in the garden instead?

This is becoming quite the regular occurrence the battle of the day time nap.

A few months ago, still so exhausted with baby Smiley, this battle was at its peak.

I’d march her back to her room telling her she was having a sleep and that was it.

This could go a number of ways:

  1. She would scream and cry, wake up her baby sister, and then all three of us would be crying.
  2. She would trash her room in protest.
  3. She would go to sleep.

I have been in deep denial that she no longer needs her daytime nap. Many of her friends gave up their naps long ago and I knew this day would be coming soon enough. I am fully aware that it is perfectly normal for a three-year-old to no longer need a glorious two hour sleep during the day, but that doesn’t stop me from digging my heels in.

My days can average 13 – 14 hours alone with the kids and I crave a break during the day. Just as much as they do, I need a time out. A chance to recharge, recoup, to take a few deep breaths and just sit.

The problem is that Miss Curly-locks is digging her heels in too.

I’ve come to realise that I can’t force her to have this nap. It’s stressing her out and it’s stressing me out. It’s not doing anyone any good.

I don’t know whether or not it’s me surrendering, or that I’ve learned to accept it.

My little girl is growing up and with that comes change. I need to be flexible. I need to be aware of her needs as well as mine. This is just another milestone she’s reached and as with the others I need to be happy with and proud of her progress.

On the whole, Curly-locks can handle not having a sleep. It is pretty rare these days that we have a meltdown due to lack of sleep.

Every afternoon, I still take her to her room, read her a couple of stories, tuck her in and cross my fingers. If she sleeps great, if she doesn’t that’s okay too.

I suppose you could say we’ve come to a truce. She can watch a DVD while lying on the couch, read a book, or colour while mummy has her time out. I consider myself incredibly lucky that she understands that I need this mummy time and that a little time apart during the day does us both the world of good.

At what age did your kids give up their day time nap?

61 comments on No more naps

  1. Bec | Mumma Tells
    September 19, 2013 at 6:54 am (4 years ago)

    Gah! Like you, I’m just as attached to the {little} Big Girl’s nap as you are! Most days still include a lovely lengthy number. But there are days when she skips them altogether, without any real backlash either. I am crossing my fingers, toes, EYES, everything that she continues them for a long while yet! At least while I’m newborn wrangling… please…

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 8:47 am (4 years ago)

      Oh I know, Bec. You seriously need that break if you have a bub to contend with too. I’ll keep everything crossed for you too πŸ™‚

      Reply
  2. Stevie
    September 19, 2013 at 11:45 am (4 years ago)

    My eldest has always been a shocking sleeper and dropped his daily day time nap at 2 years old. A few weeks before his brother was born actually, ugh. I didn’t fight him because I didn’t need the extra drama with a newborn. However, he is in daycare 2 days a week now and he has a 1-2 hour sleep EVERY SINGLE TIME.

    At home he has quiet time after lunch, usually watches a movie and I make him lie down on the couch. If we have had a big morning he’ll often have a snooze. I think having some time to yourself during the day is good. It give me a chance to recharge for the afternoon.

    Now I’m looking forward to the little one dropping down to one sleep in the next couple of months.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 1:22 pm (4 years ago)

      My sister had the same experience, Stevie. Her little one never wanted to sleep at home, but had a good couple of hours at daycare each day. Go figure! They’re forever changing aren’t they?!

      Reply
  3. Sam Stone @ A Life on Venus
    September 19, 2013 at 12:51 pm (4 years ago)

    Hey Renee, I really love the new banner. Zanni did a great job πŸ™‚
    My little miss, who is now 5, dropped her day sleeps when she was close to 4 and I was devastated. But obviously got used to it. We now have an 8 month old and he is on 2 sleeps a day at the moment – in fact he is asleep now.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 1:23 pm (4 years ago)

      Ooh how lovely, Sam. I hope he has a good sleep for you. Wow, you did well with your first sleeping up to the age of four. Hopefully your second will be just as good a sleeper. Thanks for letting me know you like the new banner. Zanni did do a great job πŸ™‚

      Reply
  4. Me
    September 19, 2013 at 2:42 pm (4 years ago)

    Honestly, I have absolutely no idea but I think it’s great that you recognise that she is growing up and her needs are changing. I think it’s fantastic that you have worked a compromise with her so, even if she isn’t sleeping, she has some quiet time to give you a chance to do what you want to do. To me that is a win-win situation and you can’t ask for more than that.
    Have the best day !
    Me

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 2:43 pm (4 years ago)

      Yes, I’m definitely happy with that, Linda. Let’s hope it lasts. Have a great day too!

      Reply
  5. Mamagoingsolo
    September 19, 2013 at 3:23 pm (4 years ago)

    Great post – I think that time out is so important, for her as well as you, each day. We all need time to be quiet and relax. My 18 month old is dropping to 1 nap a day now, most days, but she still gets tired in the mornings, so often she’ll have an hour in her cot, just playing with her toys or reading, and it gives us both a bit more energy til the proper nap after lunch. Love the new artwork by the way! Zanni’s so clever πŸ™‚

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 8:41 pm (4 years ago)

      Thank you! Yes, I think it’s a good change for the blog πŸ™‚ That’s great your little one is content to just play in her cot. I hope she continues to do that for you. My three year old has never been a fan of playing independently, you’re off to a good start!

      Reply
  6. Clare
    September 19, 2013 at 7:33 pm (4 years ago)

    You have been very lucky to have her nap this long! Evie dropped hers when she was 2 – a month after Emily was born! Thankfully she started to enjoy Disney DVDs so she would watch one in my bed while I either fed my baby or got on the bed with Evie and had a well needed little shut eye – even if she didn’t! Thankfully our bedroom door, once shut, is difficult and noisy to open so if I did fall asleep and Evie decided she didn’t want to watch a film anymore I would hear her struggle to get out of the room and wake up!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 8:42 pm (4 years ago)

      Great timing, Evie πŸ˜‰ Sounds like you found a solution that suited all of you. I hope Emily is still having her daytime naps πŸ™‚

      Reply
  7. Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me
    September 19, 2013 at 8:17 pm (4 years ago)

    Best move ever lovely – I did the same with Hunter, now 3.75 – (ha ha) and it would end in tears for both of us, now he plays in room, reads books or does puzzles while I have a break and his younger bro sleeps. It’s hard when you don’t get a break during the day – I KNOW. I hope work is going okay?! I bet your exhausted but invigorated!
    LOVE LOVE the new look blog BTW – can’t wait til I can get mine sorted
    Em xx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 19, 2013 at 8:46 pm (4 years ago)

      Yeah, we weren’t getting anywhere and we’re both feeling a lot calmer now. I sure am exhausted and a little invigorated too πŸ™‚ The hardest thing has been missing the girls. I thought it would be good to have the break, but not that much!!! I’m so glad you like the new look. I’m such a scaredy cat when it comes to change, but hopefully everyone will like it.
      Ps. Love the name Hunter πŸ™‚ xx

      Reply
  8. Adam E
    September 19, 2013 at 9:45 pm (4 years ago)

    No naps = earlier bed time?

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 6:14 am (4 years ago)

      Unfortunately, not in our case Adam. If she goes to bed early she’ll wake up at the crack of dawn :/

      Reply
  9. Joanne at Poppies for Me
    September 20, 2013 at 6:27 am (4 years ago)

    Oh, I do feel your pain. Our little man dropped his naps in April this year. 1 month after his little brother was born. I was devastated, to say the least. The good news is that he has welcomed the nap back, 5 months later. He tells me, “im sleepy marma.” And off he goes to his bed. Maybe he is going through a growth spurt? I don’t know. Maybe this will happen to your little 3 too…? The mystery of the threes continues. All i know is that the nap is back and I am so happy!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:43 pm (4 years ago)

      Yay! That’s awesome, Joanne. He must be burning up a little more energy and just needs to recharge during the day. Bonus!

      Reply
  10. Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
    September 20, 2013 at 6:41 am (4 years ago)

    As the kids got older we switched our naps to “quiet time” instead. We still do it at times of a weekend even though our kids are much older (13 and 9). We adults need it! It just means everyone goes to their rooms for quiet time alone which means laying down to sleep or watch TV or read a book. Just so everyone can chill out in their own zone and rest. Quiet time lasts for an hour and a half.
    Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:45 pm (4 years ago)

      That is awesome, Leanne. Such a great idea. A little alone and chill out time can do wonders!

      Reply
  11. Lydia C. Lee
    September 20, 2013 at 6:44 am (4 years ago)

    Those golden moments – what a shocker when they go! Good for you for finding middle ground.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:45 pm (4 years ago)

      They sure are golden moments. I hope my second child will keep her naps up as long as my first did!

      Reply
  12. Lydia C. Lee
    September 20, 2013 at 6:44 am (4 years ago)

    Like the new pics, by the way. Looking good!!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:46 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks so much, Lydia. I’m hoping people will find it a happy, casual place to be.

      Reply
  13. Rhianna
    September 20, 2013 at 7:19 am (4 years ago)

    I kept with daytime sleeps for as long as possible. My three year old has just given them up as well. Sigh. Makes me want to cry some days because I for one still relish day time sleeps!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:47 pm (4 years ago)

      Oh, I hear you, Rhianna. I desperately want that time out some days. I suppose before we know it they’ll be teenagers never wanting to get out of bed!

      Reply
  14. Mel
    September 20, 2013 at 7:22 am (4 years ago)

    Ahh yes, I am hearing you on this one. I’ve been digging in my heels for 12 months trying to hang onto one or two day sleeps a week. I use to try and enforce it every day but like you say, it was stressful for me and my daughter. I much preferred it if she watched a DVD or tried to play by herself as opposed to a screaming match. My daughter, who is almost 4, will still have one or two day sleeps (usually one of the weekend and one in between pre-school days) if I bribe her with chocolate! Probably not the best form of parenting but some days I will do ANYTHING for a break.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:49 pm (4 years ago)

      Lol, Mel! I know what you mean. I actually told her today that if she had a good sleep she could have a Nutella when she woke up πŸ™‚

      Reply
  15. Neets
    September 20, 2013 at 7:58 am (4 years ago)

    Loving your new blog Renee and how stunning do you look in your profile piccie!! My 2.5 year old still loves her 2 hour morning nap but sadly, my 4 year old waved goodbye to his over a year ago. I’m ok with that though. It gives me quality time with him whilst Foofy Mc Faff is asleep. Hope you have a super Friday x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:50 pm (4 years ago)

      Aww shucks, thanks so much Neets! Well at least you have one still sleeping and it must be nice to have the quality time with the other. Have a great weekend x

      Reply
  16. stephanie
    September 20, 2013 at 8:02 am (4 years ago)

    my littleman still mostly has a day sleep, on the days he decides to stay awake, we just encourage him to have a rest. I do however miss having time to get stuff done when it happens. Nice that it’s working out for you!

    Reply
  17. Grace
    September 20, 2013 at 8:33 am (4 years ago)

    I do feel your pain, Renee. When the boys gave up their day sleep I was at an absolute loss! What was insult to injury was that they slept like angels at daycare! Gah!!! Hang in there. Somehow we adjust πŸ™‚ x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:51 pm (4 years ago)

      Ugh, I know. My sister has the same problem. My little one is even worse at daycare. When I see ‘rested’ written on her info sheet I know I’m going to have a rough arvo. But you are right, somehow we do just adjust x

      Reply
  18. Lynda - all about mama
    September 20, 2013 at 8:48 am (4 years ago)

    It is a hard adjustment when the naps have to be dropped. I often think what a blessing it is that God made babies/small children with a need to have day naps :-). I made the adjustment by changing the nap into quiet rest time where they lay on the lounge, can look at books, but I make it clear that it is QUIET time. With three little ones with me all day, it is just too tiring if I don’t get some sort of break and it’s good for them too. Love the new look – it looks great :-).

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:52 pm (4 years ago)

      Thank you, Lynda. I don’t know how you do it with three little ones. Quiet time is definitely a must for everyone!

      Reply
  19. Eva @ The Multitasking Mummy
    September 20, 2013 at 11:10 am (4 years ago)

    Oh I can just imagine how difficult this must be, that you lose that bit of ‘me’ time while she was having her sleep. Although I haven’t been through this yet, I’m not looking forward to the day when I don’t get my couple of hours to do what I need to do. A lot of my friends with 3 year olds have also said their children have dropped their daytime nap too, so it must happen around that age (all the stuff I’m learning :).

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:53 pm (4 years ago)

      Ahh yes, Eva. It is a massive learning curve isn’t it?! It is hard to let that daytime nap go, but I guess it has to happen some time πŸ™‚

      Reply
  20. Pip
    September 20, 2013 at 12:10 pm (4 years ago)

    Oh My God. I seriously don’t know how I’m going to cope without that nap. Although weekends will be a hell of a lot more flexible as we always try to get her back to her cot for a sleep – she never gets the benefit of them when we are out. Love the ‘Are we cool’ sum up of her look. So true πŸ˜‰

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:54 pm (4 years ago)

      Yeah, that’s a good point, Pip. It’s nice to not have to rush home to get her to sleep and be a little more flexible with what we do during the day πŸ™‚

      Reply
  21. Tara @glutenfreehart
    September 20, 2013 at 1:22 pm (4 years ago)

    My 3 yr old still has no fuss day time naps for a couple of hours EVERY day. I figure because we often have ugly public displays it gives me total bragging rights ~ it kinda evens things out. Yes. I’m going with that..

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 8:56 pm (4 years ago)

      Lol. Two hours sleeps everyday!?! I’m mega jealous, Tara. That is awesome πŸ™‚

      Reply
  22. Maxabella
    September 20, 2013 at 2:31 pm (4 years ago)

    It’s SO HARD to let the daytime sleep go, Renee. If I told you that my firstborn was 18 MONTHS when he dropped his, would that help?? I had a newborn babe at the time too. Actually, all three of mine didn’t particularly like a day sleep. I hope you instigate ‘quiet time’ pronto to make up for it. That’s what got me through!!! x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:00 pm (4 years ago)

      Ahh yes, I really don’t know how good I have it and how lucky I am! I hope my second takes a leaf out of her sister’s book. I have a feeling she’s going to be the wild child in the family though πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  23. Nikki @ Wonderfully Women
    September 20, 2013 at 3:49 pm (4 years ago)

    No more nap time was a tough adjustment, but it just has to happen. I tried to promote quiet time, with an activity that they had to do in their room. Sometimes they napped other times they didn’t.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:01 pm (4 years ago)

      Yes, I definitely think the key is to be flexible and go with the flow πŸ™‚

      Reply
  24. Aroha @ Colours of Sunset
    September 20, 2013 at 4:50 pm (4 years ago)

    My son was NEVER a good sleeper and NEVER slept 2 hours during the day. So I guess he was just preparing me for the day when he would give up daytime naps all together! I can’t say I miss those days! I agree, some “quiet time”maybe, so that you can have some quiet time too. Good luck! x Aroha

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:02 pm (4 years ago)

      Thanks Aroha! I guess I don’t know how good I had it!! πŸ™‚

      Reply
  25. Kylez @ A Study in Contradictions
    September 20, 2013 at 6:16 pm (4 years ago)

    I am dreading when Mia gives up her day sleep, dreading it! She isn’t yet two though so I am desperately hoping she will continue them for a while yet! Although my Mum tells me I gave mine up at 2 so I wouldn’t be surprised if she did the same!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:02 pm (4 years ago)

      Hopefully she can hang in there for a bit longer, Kylie, especially with the new bub on the scene.

      Reply
  26. Lisa@RandomActsOfZen
    September 20, 2013 at 6:25 pm (4 years ago)

    I’m not sure exactly what age, but I do know it was a sad milestone for me, it meant my baby was growing up.
    It sounds like the perfect compromise Renee, you both get some downtime. xx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:03 pm (4 years ago)

      They grow up so quickly don’t they?! I can’t believe I’m going to have a one year old soon xx

      Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:03 pm (4 years ago)

      Oh thank you, Lisa xx

      Reply
  27. Emma @ Five Degrees of Chaos
    September 20, 2013 at 7:46 pm (4 years ago)

    Oooh, no more naps is a big adjustment! My twins were still having day naps at 3.5 but Miss 10 and Miss 5 had both dropped theirs completely by 18 months, it was heinous! I hope you’re able to stretch Curly Locks out a little longer πŸ™‚
    #FYBF

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 20, 2013 at 9:04 pm (4 years ago)

      Oh I bet it was, Emma. I might be lucky to stretch her out a big longer. Fingers crossed πŸ™‚

      Reply
  28. Lara @ This Charming Mum
    September 20, 2013 at 9:44 pm (4 years ago)

    I must admit I’ve been known to put my 2 year old in the car after lunch and drive around until he sleeps. I can then at least read a book in the car for awhile or check emails (or nap, if we can find a nice shady spot!). It’s a little dysfunctional, but it’s not every day. I’m hanging onto those precious moments of ‘me time’ for as long as I can!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 21, 2013 at 6:35 am (4 years ago)

      Nice work, Lara. I have done that on occasion too at desperate times πŸ™‚

      Reply
  29. Sally@Toddlers on Tour
    September 21, 2013 at 7:06 pm (4 years ago)

    I sympathise with your plight as I too clung to the naps for sanity.
    So I introduced quiet time with a DVD movie put on in my room while I ate my lunch in peace catching up with “Grey’s Anatomy etc” – the important things in life.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 21, 2013 at 7:22 pm (4 years ago)

      Sally, that sounds like the most awesome arrangement. I love me a bit of Grey’s πŸ™‚ Thanks for dropping by πŸ™‚

      Reply
  30. Emily
    September 26, 2013 at 8:06 am (4 years ago)

    My eldest is three too, and still naps every day. Some days it’s half an hour – other days it’s two, maybe even three hours! She still really needs the sleep, but every now and then, if I have to be somewhere or if I have to get something done, she can skip it and I know she’ll be okay. She’s usually asleep on the couch by 6.30 if we skip it though!

    Fingers crossed her brother clings to his naps this long, but at six months old he’s already looking to drop to two, so I doubt it!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      September 26, 2013 at 1:45 pm (4 years ago)

      Fingers crossed! Sounds like you have a good arrangement with your eldest. By the sounds of it, we’re lucky to have three year olds who still nap πŸ™‚

      Reply

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