Sayonara snuggly

Something kind of huge happened with our three-year-old Curly-locks last week.

For the first time in her life, she spent an entire day without her comforter, Teddy.

Curly-locks and Teddy have been BFFs ever since they were introduced a bit over three years ago. At first they only snuggled in bed together, but it wasn’t long before she wanted him to go everywhere with her. They were tight and I mean seriously tight.

Curly-locks is a sensitive and shy wee thing and Teddy gives her the security and comfort she needs to help her through any situations where she feels a little unsure.

Toward the end of last year we thought she was finally letting go, but with the start of pre-school this year, new friends and new teachers, she has run back into his worn arms.

When she announced last week that she wanted to go to pre-school without him, I felt like I had walked into some sort of parallel universe. It was completely out of left field.

The day had started just like any other with us rushing around madly trying to get to work and daycare on time.

We had dragged our daughters’ sleepy little bodies out of bed and forced breakfast down their throats before they’d even had a chance to wake up properly. We dressed them, brushed their teeth, plaited their hair – you know the drill.

Dave and I moved through these motions at warp speed without thinking, just doing.

While all of this action was going on, there was someone in this house who was thinking though. A little someone who stood quietly and patiently in the doorway waiting for me to ask the question I ask every time we leave the house.

‘Everybody got their teddy?’ I asked on cue.

‘I don’t need Teddy today, Mummy,’ said Miss Three with a very I’m such a big girl look on her face.

Dave and I stopped dead in our tracks.

This just does not happen. We never go anywhere without Teddy and certainly not to pre-school for an entire day.

At the time I wondered if I should take him and leave him at the front desk at daycare just in case, but I feared this would only jinx us. We didn’t ask Curly-locks if she was sure, or why she didn’t need him. We didn’t make a big deal out of it. I simply said, ‘Good on you, cutie,’ and off we went to pre-school.

I couldn’t stop thinking about her the entire day. Something told me though that she would be fine.

And she was.

All she needed was time. Time to adjust, to find her confidence, to feel safe, and to find her place.

I’m so glad we didn’t push the issue with Teddy. This way it has happened naturally. It has been her decision.

I’m certain there will still be days where she needs him, but for now we are more than content with this massive progress.

Does/did your child have a comforter? What age did he/she give it up?

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46 comments on Sayonara snuggly

  1. Neets
    May 22, 2014 at 9:05 pm (3 years ago)

    What a big girl she is! You must have been do proud when she made that decision all by her own (that’s how my kids would say it). My Miss H says that she doesn’t need her baby anymore then always seems to sneak it into her bag. In her own time hey? Think I’m going to read her this post xxx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 22, 2014 at 9:18 pm (3 years ago)

      Lol. Good luck!! Teddy is on his last legs, so it’s about time πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  2. Emma Fahy Davis
    May 22, 2014 at 10:10 pm (3 years ago)

    Wow, well done Curly Locks! Maya is 11 and still sleeps with her Fussy Bubba every night even tho Fussy Bubba is now little more than a few shreds of fabric πŸ˜‰

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:26 pm (3 years ago)

      Lol. Teddy is falling to bits too πŸ™‚

      Reply
  3. Lydia C. Lee
    May 23, 2014 at 6:51 am (3 years ago)

    Yes, and about 5. I never really worried about it, but it wasn’t going to big school!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:27 pm (3 years ago)

      Oh I totally agree. We wanted to get rid of Teddy before prep!

      Reply
  4. Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
    May 23, 2014 at 6:58 am (3 years ago)

    Did your heart break just a little bit?
    Mine broke at this particular milestone. I was proud, and relieved … but a part of me just wasn’t ready.
    My sons was his “sheety” and his dummy
    My daughter’s was her bottle.
    Great milestones … but such a huge step towards leaving their baby-hood behind (sigh).
    (Says the mother of two kids who are now both in double digits …)
    Happy Friday! x o
    Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:28 pm (3 years ago)

      Lol, Leanne. No, my heart didn’t break. It was a sense of relief really that I know she is feeling comfortable in her surroundings. x

      Reply
  5. Vicki @ Knocked Up and Abroad
    May 23, 2014 at 7:36 am (3 years ago)

    Oh well done Curly Locks! Isn’t it nice to see our children grow and initiate milestones themselves without being pushed. She is obviously feeling content and secure in her little existence so I’d take that as a parenting win!

    My Little Vick has a teddy (“koala”) who he likes to sleep with but he has never had to carry him around beyond the bedroom. I think having a cuddly friend is such a strong image of childhood don’t you think?

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:28 pm (3 years ago)

      It sure is, Vicki! I have always thought that little kids with cuddlies are the cutest things, ever!! x

      Reply
  6. Bec | Mumma Tells
    May 23, 2014 at 7:47 am (3 years ago)

    Amazing. This is such a big,big step. And I love that it just happened, you know? She was ready.

    There’s a beloved Hoppy rabbit that accompanies Big to sleep every night, and two, three, four? dummies. They all appear only at bedtime but she’d be lost without them. X

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:29 pm (3 years ago)

      Aww bless. I bet she looks cute as with her little Hoppy πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  7. Bec @ Seeing the Lighter Side of Parenting
    May 23, 2014 at 8:00 am (3 years ago)

    I LOVE that you let her get there in her own time, good on you. We’ve been wondering whether it’s time to get rid of our 21 month old’s dummy, but he’s only little once!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:30 pm (3 years ago)

      That’s right, Bec. Hopefully, he’ll just decide soon enough that he doesn’t need it anymore πŸ™‚

      Reply
  8. Denise
    May 23, 2014 at 9:13 am (3 years ago)

    Awww good on her! I think I would be just a little bit heartbroken but also very proud that she’s growing up into such an independent girl:-)

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:30 pm (3 years ago)

      Yes, very proud indeed! It’s a huge step for us πŸ™‚

      Reply
  9. Me
    May 23, 2014 at 1:00 pm (3 years ago)

    K had a dummy and I can’t remember how old she was – probably not yet 2 because she was still at home with our nanny. Anyway, it was a Friday afternoon and she told Margaret that she didn’t need her dummy anymore and threw them away in the rubbish bin. Margaret forgot to tell us about this and when it was bed time, she wanted her dummy and we searched high and low but couldn’t find them anywhere. She did mention something about the bin and we looked in the bin but couldn’t see them. She was miserable but we said that there was nothing we could do – Margaret had gone home for the weekend (and it was back in the day before mobiles !!!) and by Monday she had forgotten about them – so did we – until about 2 yrs later when I went to use a big pot (that clearly I didn’t use very often) – I found a packet with all her dummies in !!! Margaret had taken them out the bin and put them in the pot – just in case we did need them !!!
    Have the best day and big hugs to Curly for taking a huge step.
    Me xox

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:32 pm (3 years ago)

      Thanks Linda πŸ™‚ I bet you would have been stressing when you couldn’t find those dummies. Glad it all worked out in the end xx

      Reply
  10. Emily @ Have A Laugh On Me
    May 23, 2014 at 2:06 pm (3 years ago)

    My 6yo still has her nigh nighs at night when she sleeps, but doesn’t need it otherwise, in fact same with my 2.5yo – he has a sleeping thing but that’s it. My middle boy can take or leave his doggy. I LOVE that kids have comforters, to me it’s important they feel safe no matter what. Go you for being so patient and loving x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:33 pm (3 years ago)

      Yes, I totally agree. I don’t mind her having it at all if it’s going to make her feel calm and safe. Meanwhile, what a cute name is nigh nights πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  11. EssentiallyJess
    May 23, 2014 at 3:13 pm (3 years ago)

    Yep two if mine still have one, but we don’t take them out.. We’ve cut back to just bed time use (or TV time if they are really tired, like now.). I’m impressed your girl did it on her own. That’s awesome.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:34 pm (3 years ago)

      Thanks πŸ™‚ That’s great they use theirs just for night time. If she has it at night, I really don’t mind. I was starting to worry that she’d want to take it when she started school though πŸ™‚

      Reply
  12. Kathy
    May 23, 2014 at 5:14 pm (3 years ago)

    Well done curly-locks – such a big step. We may have a certain almost 11-year-old in our house who still has her blankie at night and it doesn’t show any signs of disappearing soon. I must have had a sense of the strong attachment to come when I bought it, as it was good quality and a bit expensive – best money I’ve ever spent.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:35 pm (3 years ago)

      Thankfully ours is a good quality one too. I actually bought two of them!

      Reply
  13. Bec @ The Plumbette
    May 23, 2014 at 8:04 pm (3 years ago)

    This post proves that when our kids are ready, they will give up their teddies and dummies or whatever they get their comfort from. We took Esther’s dummies away recently at 3 which is a long time for dummy use but she wasn’t willing to give them up but a trip to the dentist about a gap between her teeth pushed the button to get rid of them. Magdalene goes to bed with her teddies but only uses them at night, not during the day.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:37 pm (3 years ago)

      I think it’s great if you can restrict it to night time use, but if they need it during the day, as Curly-locks did, then I don’t think it matters at all. As long as they feel secure. Giving up the dummy must have been hard. I hope it wasn’t too much of a battle for you.

      Reply
  14. Emily
    May 23, 2014 at 8:20 pm (3 years ago)

    They just know, don’t they? Good on you for not bringing it anyway. My kids don’t really have comfort toys. We tried, they just didn’t take. A blessing in the long run – no tears over forgotten toys – but it would be nice to have something they liked to cuddle when they’re upset!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 23, 2014 at 8:38 pm (3 years ago)

      Yes, some kids just don’t need them do they. Mine certainly do! πŸ™‚

      Reply
  15. Becky from BeckyandJames.com
    May 23, 2014 at 8:33 pm (3 years ago)

    My boy had a blue and white giraffe since birth, named Love. This year he stopped taking him everywhere and I think it’s me who didn’t cope with the change as apposed to him. I wasn’t ready for him to be so grown up yet!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:17 pm (3 years ago)

      Yep, I totally get that, Becky! What a cute name for a giraffe πŸ™‚

      Reply
  16. Toni
    May 23, 2014 at 9:17 pm (3 years ago)

    I bought one when she was first born, but she hasn’t really used it. She always sleeps with a wrap up against her face though so I guess they have taken its place. She even gets the tags now and strokes her own face with them. I always used to do it to put her to sleep when she was little.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:11 pm (3 years ago)

      Oh bless, Toni. That is the cutest thing ever. She is such a doll πŸ™‚

      Reply
  17. JodiGibson (@JFGibsonWriter)
    May 23, 2014 at 9:47 pm (3 years ago)

    Our girls had a pooh bear each, but it was always only for bed/nap times or if they were sick or really tired. Miss 8 still has hers in bed, although doesn’t need it to sleep. Miss 4 still has hers too and loves to softly snuggle with it but also doesn’t ‘rely’ on it. I think it’s fine. As you say, when they are ready they let go. And sometimes we all need a teddy to cuddle, even adults x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:12 pm (3 years ago)

      So true, Jodi! You hit the nail on the head with the word ‘rely’. I don’t mind if Curly-locks still wants Ted around. It’s just the reliance on him that worried me πŸ™‚ Thanks for dropping in x

      Reply
  18. Caitlin
    May 23, 2014 at 11:36 pm (3 years ago)

    What a lovely little tale of a sweet little girl growing up. xxx

    Reply
  19. Elisa
    May 24, 2014 at 4:31 pm (3 years ago)

    I love that you gave her that time. They grow so very quickly. We have a dummy-obsessed two year old, kind of the same situation…! X

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:13 pm (3 years ago)

      Ahh yes. Those dummies can be tricky to get rid of so I hear. I’m sure yours will give it up too when the time is right πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  20. Sam Stone @ A Life on Venus
    May 24, 2014 at 5:06 pm (3 years ago)

    Both our kids have. Little miss still sleeps with her blanky. Our 18 month old is joined at the hip with is monkey.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:14 pm (3 years ago)

      Sam, I tell you what, our youngest are a match made in heaven. Smiley has a monkey too! Bless xx

      Reply
  21. Erin
    May 25, 2014 at 7:40 am (3 years ago)

    That is lovely. My second princess has had various comforters. Last night she went to bed with a soaking wet rabbit that she absolutely had to take into the bath with her. We couldn’t convince her that rabbit needed a bit of a spin in the dryer so she snuggled up with a damp and cold stuffed animal all night! We don’t push it either.

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 25, 2014 at 9:15 pm (3 years ago)

      Lol, OMG Erin. Don’t worry. We’ve been there too. Why oh why do they want them in the bath?! πŸ™‚

      Reply
  22. Grace
    May 25, 2014 at 9:40 pm (3 years ago)

    Oh, what a huge step for Curly Locks! Huge milestone. So nice that you’ve documented this. It’ll bring some beautiful memories for the family πŸ™‚ x

    Reply
  23. Kate QTQF
    May 26, 2014 at 8:35 am (3 years ago)

    oohhh, this is so sweet. My boys have never taken a snuggly but they are big on finger sucking – the little one sucks his thumb when he’s really tired but the older one sucks middle and pointer fingers and it is a full blown habit now. I keep saying I’ll crack down on it once his back molars are through…we’ll see who wins that one! I hope Curly Locks had a great day full of confidence x

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      May 26, 2014 at 9:33 pm (3 years ago)

      Thank you so much, Kate. Meanwhile, it’s funny you mentioned the thumb and finger sucking as my littlest girl constantly has her thumb in her mouth. I think that is going to be a lot harder to get rid of than a snuggly :/ x

      Reply

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