Conversations with change

The air was filled with the chatter of a dozen little girls excitedly queuing to have their faces painted.

Dressed in a rainbow of colours they twisted and twirled as they happily waited their turn.

Amidst the chatter was one little girl not so chatty. A little girl who stood quiet as a mouse, her big brown eyes wide and serious. Thinking. (Her thinking face she calls it).

We were at a fairy party for my niece’s fifth birthday and the little girl above, of course, is none other than our darling four-year-old, Curly-locks.

Until last weekend, Curly-locks had never had her face painted.

‘It’s scary,’ she would say.

‘It will hurt. I don’t want to do it.’

We’d never pushed the matter. It’s only a face paint of course and we knew she’d get over it in her own time.

I forewarned Curly-locks that there would be face painting at her beloved cousin’s party and encouraged her to give it a go. My attempts were futile. She remained steadfast in her anti face paint stance.

The morning of the party I decided to make her an offer. I knew she secretly wanted to have her face painted, especially if her cousin was having hers done. She just needed a little extra support.

I asked her if I had my face painted would she get hers painted too.

She looked at me with her serious brown eyes for a moment until they flickered with excitement. My offer was met with an emphatic, ‘Yes!’

As we drove to the party her excitement grew. Every now and then she would double check that I was still getting my face painted. She needed me there for support and I was happy to oblige. (I secretly wanted my face painted too).

It wasn’t until crunch time that her serious face returned. Surprisingly, she didn’t reach for my hand or ask me to get my face painted first. She simply lined up behind the other little girls and waited.

Mum and I looked at each other as we watched her wait. She was the very last in the queue and we half expected her to pull out before her turn. She didn’t. She stood there unwavering.

She had made a promise to herself that day. A promise that she was determined to keep.

She does this, I’m learning. She pushes herself out of her comfort zone and commits herself. If she wants something bad enough, no matter how scary it is, she faces up to her fears and goes for it.

She is a deep thinker, this one. She does things in her own time quietly readying herself for change.

facepaint2

When it came to her turn she stood as still as a statue until her face paint was done. She then walked bashfully over to her cousin who held up a mirror for her to admire herself in. She skipped over to me proudly, her worried face only reappearing momentarily when she asked if her face was dripping off πŸ™‚

This may seem like an insignificant event to some as what child doesn’t like a face paint? This was big for us though and another sign that Curly-locks is continuing to grow in confidence.

facepaint
We see changes in her every day. Big changes. Changes that happen so quickly that if we blink we’ll miss them.

We are learning how excited she is to experience new things and how open she is to change. She just has to do it all in her own time, very much like her parents πŸ™‚

How do you or your children deal with change? Has your child taken a leap out of their comfort zone lately?

Linking up today with always Josefa for Conversations over coffee. Each month Josefa elects a theme to write to. This month’s theme is: Conversations with change.

Also linking up with Grace for Flog Yo Blog Friday.

57 comments on Conversations with change

  1. Lydia C. Lee
    February 26, 2015 at 8:32 am (3 years ago)

    Lovely – and lovely pics. It’s interesting what they’re fearful of, and then suddenly not. But nothing has changed (see what I did there). Life is very blink and you’ll miss it.

    Reply
  2. Josefa
    February 26, 2015 at 11:31 am (3 years ago)

    A beautiful moment in your daughter’s life to share Renee. Change happens both quickly and slowly with my boys. Sometimes they dive into change without looking and bomb right into change – a bit like a swimming pool bomb. Other times there need to be log talks with mum, long cuddles in bed and lots of time to get used to the idea of whatever the new change may be. I respect both ways. Especially being afraid of change for most of my life. I do try to teach them not to make such an issue of new things and to open their hearts and try things fearlessly. But we all need to get their in our own time, with our own changes. Thank you for linking up such a special moment for #convocoffee Josefa

    Want to nominate a theme for a future #convocoffee?

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 26, 2015 at 8:18 pm (3 years ago)

      Very true, Josefa. I love seeing their little personalities unfold and am always wondering what sort of person they will be when they grow up. I’ll let you know if I come up with a theme πŸ™‚

      Reply
  3. Kate
    February 26, 2015 at 11:35 am (3 years ago)

    Gorgeous. Mine is very much like this but his big sister leads the way. He needs to see her do whatever it is before committing himself. And once he does, the pride on his face! Priceless.

    With the face painting, it took any attempts. Started small then, on the hand, on the arm, then, only then, the face.

    It

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 26, 2015 at 8:19 pm (3 years ago)

      My youngest is the same. If she sees her sister doing it then she thinks it must be okay and she leaps in as well πŸ™‚

      Reply
  4. Fashionista
    February 26, 2015 at 12:06 pm (3 years ago)

    So where’s your face painting?! Or did she not require your support in the end?

    And I do rather want the face painting fairy’s outfit………….

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 26, 2015 at 8:20 pm (3 years ago)

      Oh it was such an awesome outfit!! Yes, I didn’t need to get mine done in the end as much as I wanted to πŸ™‚

      Reply
  5. Robyn
    February 26, 2015 at 9:31 pm (3 years ago)

    Gorgeous. It’s a good reminder to put ourselves in their little shoes every now and again. So easy to forget they don’t have the experience that we do, and life can be pretty scary. xx

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:53 pm (3 years ago)

      It sure can, Robyn. What we think is no big deal can be very big for them x

      Reply
  6. Toni @ Finding Myself Young
    February 26, 2015 at 9:45 pm (3 years ago)

    I still remember a day at preschool when we got our face painted and I was so excited. I have a photo and I have the biggest smile on my face. Why didn’t you get yours done too! I totally still would’ve got mine done if it was bub. You know totally for her, ha not.

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:54 pm (3 years ago)

      Haha. I wanted to so badly, but I was too shy lol. Now you know where she gets it from πŸ™‚

      Reply
  7. Min@WriteoftheMiddle
    February 27, 2015 at 6:47 am (3 years ago)

    What a brave little girl you have – to face her fear with courage when she was ready! She is so cute and she looks beautiful with her face painted! So you didn’t end up with yours painted Renee? I hope you weren’t too upset if not! πŸ˜‰ My daughter (aged 19) does kids parties on weekends – she dresses in various characters (fairies, Elsa from frozen etc etc) – she face paints and she does ballooning! It only seems like the other day that she was little girl like yours! x

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:57 pm (3 years ago)

      Min that is very useful information to know. My daughter’s birthday is coming up in July and would love a grown up Elsa πŸ™‚ Although we have said no party this year. We’ll see what happens πŸ™‚ I’ll contact you if we’re in need of an Elsa entertainer πŸ™‚

      Reply
  8. Lauren @ The Thud
    February 27, 2015 at 6:50 am (3 years ago)

    Oh my goodness this is too too sweet. I can so imagine her little face – so serious but determined and then so proud she went through with it. How bloody adorable. The rate at which they grow up is heartbreaking but it’s so so special to watch. We are so lucky we get to be a part of it, aren’t we?

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:55 pm (3 years ago)

      We sure are. They continue to surprise me every day!

      Reply
  9. Bec @ The Plumbette
    February 27, 2015 at 7:24 am (3 years ago)

    Our girls do change quite quickly don’t they? So wise to allow curly locks to try new things in her own time but it can come to a point where a gentle nudge is needed. Esther can be anxious about trying some new things where as Magdalene will give everything a go with no fear!

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:57 pm (3 years ago)

      She’s a little pocket rocket that Magdalene. Isn’t it amazing how different they all are?! x

      Reply
  10. Tonia Zemek
    February 27, 2015 at 7:51 am (3 years ago)

    This is such a beautiful post. I love your gently, gently approach and your willingness to let her grow and change in her own time – just as it should be.

    Reply
  11. Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
    February 27, 2015 at 8:12 am (3 years ago)

    My eldest embraces it and my youngest fights it tooth and nail.
    Gorgeous pics πŸ™‚
    L

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:58 pm (3 years ago)

      Isn’t it crazy how different they can be?! πŸ™‚

      Reply
  12. sarah @Tomfo
    February 27, 2015 at 9:58 am (3 years ago)

    It’s so cool to watch them grow up, my little guy was the same, but now he lines up to get his face painted every time. Enjoy every moment and have a good weekend Renee x

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 1:59 pm (3 years ago)

      Thanks Sarah. Good luck with the seachange πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  13. Maxabella
    February 27, 2015 at 9:58 am (3 years ago)

    She looks beautiful and I’m so impressed that she did so well. Change is exceptionally hard for all of us, I think. The only difference is that “in our own time” is shorter or longer for people. Like you, I need advanced warning to get used to the idea, but then I launch myself in with gusto. My kids are all three different, but none of them is especially adaptable to change. I hope this changes for them as they grow older because I think it’s a very important way to be. x

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 2:00 pm (3 years ago)

      It is indeed and I love your thoughts on getting used to change in our own time and that it can be shorter or longer for people x

      Reply
  14. Caroline Raj @ Mamma Raj Says
    February 27, 2015 at 10:22 am (3 years ago)

    Love this story. Our kids are changing so quickly it is hard to keep up! My daughter is starting to have a verbal explosion – from no words and now they are all tumbling out. It is a lovely time and I’m trying my best to understand what the hell she is saying!

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 2:02 pm (3 years ago)

      Lol! It is a great age when they first start talking. Lots of fun and life is never the same!

      Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:31 pm (3 years ago)

      I didn’t need to get mine done after all πŸ™‚ I was most disappointed πŸ™‚

      Reply
  15. Vicki @ Knocked Up and Abroad
    February 27, 2015 at 11:14 am (3 years ago)

    This is just beautiful. I too have a four year old who is scared of getting his face painted. It has not happened yet to date. You handled this beautifully to give her to confidence to overcome her fear. High fives to you Mumma x

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:32 pm (3 years ago)

      Oh wow! Isn’t that funny. Maybe it’s more common than I thought. I am sure he will get there in his own time x

      Reply
  16. Denise
    February 27, 2015 at 11:18 am (3 years ago)

    Ahh she is a cutie Renee. It’s amazing how many new things kids experience every day. I wonder their little brains can cope with it all. My son is a bit young for face painting. But he has just started drawing and colouring. He coloured half the kitchen cupboards this morning when I wasn’t looking, the monkey!

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:32 pm (3 years ago)

      Haha! What a fun stage he’s at! πŸ™‚

      Reply
  17. Emily
    February 27, 2015 at 11:56 am (3 years ago)

    Lovely! And now she’ll do it every time! Great pics. (I was hoping to see a pic of your face paint though…)

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:33 pm (3 years ago)

      I know! Sorry to disappoint πŸ™‚

      Reply
  18. Peachy Keen Mumma - Jess
    February 27, 2015 at 1:08 pm (3 years ago)

    Oh man, I really was looking forward to a picture of you with your face painted Renee. Also – could my ovaries hurt any more for want of a little girl in my life. OUCH! Curly locks is such a cutie patootie

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:33 pm (3 years ago)

      Aww thanks. Girls are a lot of fun πŸ™‚

      Reply
  19. Lisa@RandomActsOfZen
    February 27, 2015 at 2:36 pm (3 years ago)

    It’s a mixture of relief and pride when they push themselves towards something that you just know they really want, isn’t it Renee? Your little doll looks gorgeous xx

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:44 pm (3 years ago)

      Thanks Lisa. Yes, it was a pretty special moment for us πŸ™‚ x

      Reply
  20. Ingrid @ Fabulous and Fun Life
    February 27, 2015 at 2:52 pm (3 years ago)

    You daughter looks gorgeous in her outfit with her face painted.Being able to face her fears with such determination is a useful skill for her to have in life!

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:45 pm (3 years ago)

      I hope it stays with her πŸ™‚ Thanks πŸ™‚

      Reply
  21. Kaz @ Melting Moments
    February 27, 2015 at 5:42 pm (3 years ago)

    Aw, what a brave girl. Glad she was so happy with the result. Proud parenting moment right there πŸ™‚

    Reply
  22. ClaireyHewitt
    February 27, 2015 at 6:09 pm (3 years ago)

    Fantastic. I bet she was so proud of herself.

    Reply
    • Mummy, Wife, Me
      February 27, 2015 at 7:46 pm (3 years ago)

      You should have seen her ogling herself in the mirror. She was in love with herself πŸ™‚

      Reply
  23. Kathy
    February 27, 2015 at 8:49 pm (3 years ago)

    What a lovely milestone for Curly-Locks and her confidence. It sounds like she has a good process going on where she really thinks things through and is true to her intentions. Bet she doesn’t look back now.

    Reply
  24. Dannielle
    February 27, 2015 at 9:09 pm (3 years ago)

    Renee you just made me smile, tear up and giggle with this beautiful little post of yours.
    What a priceless forever to keep memoir you have just written (as almost all your gorgeous posts are).
    I felt Like I was standing with both you and your Mum, hanging on for little Curly-Locks to keep that place in the line. Just gorgeous!
    PS – I was hoping to see a picture of how your face paint turned out too! xx

    Reply
  25. Lara @ This Charming Mum
    February 28, 2015 at 4:48 am (3 years ago)

    I think it’s so special to quietly observe these moments of bravery and understanding that our kids seem to arrive at sometimes, all on their own. It makes perfect sense if I think of myself as an adult trying something new – I would do exactly the same thing: hang back and watch a few times before I took the plunge. Her face paint looks just beautiful. I hope she was very proud of herself. πŸ™‚

    Reply
  26. Malinda @mybrownpaperpackages
    March 1, 2015 at 7:30 pm (3 years ago)

    Your little girl is going to grow up into a beautiful woman one day. My daughter never liked the idea of face paint and even though I offered it to her multiple times at special events I always let her choose when she was ready (although I quietly wished she would say yes). She loves it now. But you are right, they need to make that first step themselves.

    Reply
  27. Dan @ What Dan Did Next
    March 4, 2015 at 9:44 am (3 years ago)

    As the Mum of a baby girl, I know that one day in the future we will have similar scenarios to deal with. It will be articles like this, that I will (hopefully) think back to, on how to approach said situations in the best way, helping my daughter grow with confidence. Thanks for the insights x

    Reply
  28. Grace
    March 4, 2015 at 3:32 pm (3 years ago)

    I know what you mean changes that happen so quickly you’ll miss them. We don’t realise how closely we really need to pay attention to our children. I know I tend to forget often.
    So cute how Curly Locks asked if her face was dripping off! Too cute! x

    Reply
  29. Johanna
    March 7, 2015 at 12:18 pm (3 years ago)

    Lovely story and great face paint. They are very cute!

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      March 11, 2015 at 7:44 pm (3 years ago)

      Thanks Johanna πŸ™‚

      Reply
  30. Erin@TheMumsGroup
    March 9, 2015 at 6:33 pm (3 years ago)

    Such a beautiful story Renee. First borns have a tough role, they have to pave the way and everything is new and either scary or exciting. The fact that you are sensitive to this is so awesome. Well done on this milestone! (From a first born who was painfully shy for a very long time!)
    xxx

    Reply
    • mummywifeme
      mummywifeme
      March 11, 2015 at 7:52 pm (3 years ago)

      Snap! I was a first born too, Erin πŸ™‚ Thanks for dropping in πŸ™‚

      Reply
  31. Desire Empire
    June 11, 2015 at 1:06 pm (3 years ago)

    Wow it’s a rite of passage for every little girl. It must be scary the first time.
    Carolyn

    Reply

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